SPIRIT-FILLED

by Danna Shirley

            I want to share my experience when I was wonderfully filled up to overflowing with the presence of the Holy Spirit.

            My husband, Ron, and I accepted the Lord together on a Sunday night, May 18, 1980 in an Assembly of God church in Montgomery, AL. I didn’t particularly want to attend this denomination since Ron was raised Baptist and I was Methodist and we hadn’t been in church in all of our married life but the Assemblies was something he had chosen because he liked their beliefs. My only knowledge was what I had heard from others . . . others who didn’t know the truth . . . that “those people” roll down the aisles, swing from the chandeliers, and speak in “tongues.” I was scared of the unknown. Aren’t we glad the truth does set us free?

            God touched our hearts and salvation came quickly. We attended this church with no thoughts or desire to “speak in tongues.” We just wanted to soak up the Word of God and grow in the grace and knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ just like any other Christian.

Seven months later we were off to New Jersey on a brand new job right at Christmastime. Since we were also brand new Christians, we wanted to stay in the same denomination where we had received Christ, so we searched for another Assembly of God church in Cherry Hill, NJ.  

            One Sunday morning the pastor announced there would be a teaching that afternoon on receiving the baptism of the Holy Spirit. Ron was anxious to receive; I was apprehensive. Although the experience is very real, that afternoon was disappointing to say the least.

The leader had everyone sit in the first row across the front of the sanctuary, very structured and controlled. He shared the scriptures that applied accompanied by his commentary of how to prepare our hearts and minds to be baptized in the Holy Spirit. Then he started at one end of the row and moved down the line praying over each with instructions to begin moving our mouth and speaking syllables until we were praying in a new language. He only spent a moment with each person and then proclaimed, “You have received,” and to the next, “You have received,” and on and on down the row.

What I learned that day more than anything else is that NO ONE can tell you that you have received anything and you don’t seek tongues, you seek Jesus, the Baptizer, and when He touches you, you know that you have been touched by the Spirit of God. Then YOU proclaim to have received the baptism in the Holy Spirit, without doubting, and no one can take that away from you.

            We left Cherry Hill after eight months and made our way to the Mississippi Gulf Coast. Even though we had a disappointing experience in New Jersey, we were not disappointed in God. Ron asked me to visit around until I found a church and then he would start attending with me. Cedar Lake Christian Assembly in Biloxi had just been built at a new location off of I-10 and I loved the church. It was a 42-mile round trip from where we lived but I drove it three times a week. Brother Kenneth Broadus was a great preacher and the worship was beyond wonderful.

            I had probably been attending for a few months when he preached on the baptism of the Holy Spirit. My first thought was, Oh, well. I’m not going through that again. I’ll be just fine the way I am. Being baptized in the Holy Spirit is in addition to receiving the Holy Spirit at salvation, not a prerequisite. I decided there was no way I would raise my hand, or go up for prayer, or attend some later seminar on the subject.

            At the close of the service Brother Broadus invited anyone who wanted to receive the baptism in the Holy Spirit to come forward . . .“right now” . . .“don’t stop to think about it”. . . “just come!” My feet started moving down the aisle. It was just what I needed; not to analyze, not to remember New Jersey, not to think . . . just come!

Several others joined me in the front. There was no rhyme or reason, no prayer line or organized presentation. Brother B started moving among us, stopping to pray here and there and lay hands on each forehead. Arms were raised in surrender to God. I was lost in the moment but still totally aware of my surroundings. When he finally stood before me, I began praying immediately in an unknown language without his touch ever upon my forehead. My heart was ready, my faith was sure, my Baptizer was Jesus Christ.

So how did I feel with this new experience? I remember thinking that my language didn’t sound as beautiful and melodic as some I had heard but I soon learned that I was a “baby” in this new language. I had to grow and develop into maturity just as in any area of learning. Babies crawl before they walk. I had to exercise my prayer language at the same time I exercised my faith to receive this gift from God. I would not speak evil of it. I can give many, many testimonies of the presence of the Holy Spirit in my life but two stand out in my memory.

First, it was just a few years after being baptized in the Holy Spirit that God put me in a Baptist church. I couldn’t understand why He would take me out of my comfort zone but I was obedient (reluctantly) and followed His will. I was always conscious of honoring this church’s beliefs and doctrine by NOT praying in tongues.

This congregation had split from a well-established Baptist church so it and the preacher were now a fledgling non-denominational group. Everyone was in a honeymoon period but very soon the honeymoon was over and gossip began to abound. Part of the chatter was that the preacher was beginning to lose his enthusiasm for his calling and discouragement had settled on everyone. Satan was having a heyday.

Then one Sunday night the entire service lasted less than an hour—the worship, the prayer, the sermon, the closing prayer, and the preacher was out the door to go home by 6:50. The core people were shocked and dismayed to say the least.

            Word must have gotten back to the preacher because the next Sunday night went smoother and was more ministry-minded. At the end of this service we all formed a circle and held hands to pray; then he asked if anyone wanted to say something before we closed. No one spoke.

            The Holy Spirit zapped me with a rush of heat and adrenaline. It wasn’t my place to say anything. They knew my background and I always felt their critical eyes upon me. My mind raced and my spirit denied His promptings to speak a word to repent and reconcile. I defended myself to God,  I have no right to say anything . . . I’m not a Baptist . . . they’ll never accept what You want me to say . . . only seconds passed but it seemed like an eternity as I made excuse after excuse to God why I couldn’t open my mouth.

            The preacher asked again, “Would anyone like to say anything before we close?” Nothing!

            Now my heart was racing out of my chest and I knew the pressure was on for the Holy Spirit would not let go of me. Again . . . Lord, they just won’t receive from me . . . I’m not one of them! The argument raged until the preacher began his closing prayer. The heat, the adrenaline, and my racing heart immediately went from the highest high to the lowest low. I was empty and alone. The Holy Spirit had left me.

            People began to say their goodbyes and leave the building. The night was moonless and when I got in my car, I couldn’t move. I sat there holding the steering wheel and cried and cried and begged God to forgive me for my disobedience. If He would just give me another chance, I would try never to quench the Spirit again. I’ve been pretty bold to speak out ever since, sometimes to the embarrassment of my children. J

            The preacher soon resigned from the church and left the ministry. I learned he had divorced and was working at a casino. The building was sold and the people reunited with their former congregation, which is now thriving. I don’t believe not speaking up that night led to any of these consequences but the lesson I learned was that my disobedience made me fearful to ever lose the presence of the Holy Spirit again. It was like a death knell in my soul.

            Secondly, my daughter, Kristen, was a senior in high school and two of her best friends were Theresa and Tony, twins who had lockers right next to hers. They lived farther out in the country than we did along a straight stretch of road before making a curve to the right to go to their house.

            Since it was their senior year, there was lots of fun and fiascos, as they neared graduation. One day a water balloon fight ensued and Tony got drenched. His mother was called by the school office and she gave permission for him to drive home and change clothes. When he reached that long stretch of road before the curve, he gained more and more speed until he lost control and hydroplaned into a tree several feet above the ground. He was killed instantly. Charlotte heard the crash from their house.

            Word quickly got back to the school and Kristen was devastated. I got a call from the office that she wanted to come home. I stood in the driveway praying furiously in the Spirit while I waited.

“Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.”  (Rom 8:26)

She stopped her car in front of me and jumped out. We held onto each other until she finally said, “We have to go to Miss Charlotte; we have to go to Theresa.”

            Their property looked like a parking lot. Friends, neighbors, church family had already arrived. Everyone stood helplessly. Kristen fell into Theresa’s arms. I searched for Charlotte. She was sitting in Tony’s bed alone, numb, with all his clothes piled up around her. Others in the room were standing against the wall talking in whispers. I sat on the bed and held her in my arms. What does one say? Nothing! All you can do is hold on tightly. My mouth was near her ear. I began to pray in tongues; softly, slowly, not knowing myself what I was praying but God knew. Charlotte was Catholic and I wasn’t sure if my praying in tongues would help her or scare her. Soon I was released from my prayer and I backed away.

Tony’s funeral took place in their small Catholic church with standing-room-only. I kept in touch with Charlotte for a while afterward but they eventually sold their house and moved to a neighboring town. I guess the memory was too much for the family, having to drive by the scene of the accident every day.  

She told me later what happened when I had prayed for her that day. Of everyone who came by I was the one she remembered. Why? Because what I had prayed was the most comforting, even though she couldn’t remember exactly what it was and I didn’t know either.
While I prayed, however, God was speaking to her spirit and brought peace in the midst of the storm. I wasn’t the one who comforted her—the Holy Spirit did. After all, Jesus called Him the Comforter (John 14:16 KJV).

Praying in tongues is your spirit praying through the Holy Spirit to God’s ear, bypassing all reasoning and understanding. We don’t have to know what we’re praying, just that through the Spirit it is the most perfect prayer one can pray.

“Now He who searches the hearts knows what the Mind of the Spirit is, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God.”  (Rom 8:27)

  To clear up any confusion about the presence of the Holy Spirit, there are two distinct experiences described in the Bible. First, we receive His indwelling presence at the point of salvation.

“…do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?” (1 Cor 6:19)

“And I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper [Comforter], that He may abide with you forever—the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him; but you know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you.” (John 14:16-17)

To be baptized in the Holy Spirit, however, is an additional gift, one which you pray and ask for from the Baptizer, Jesus.

John the Baptist said, “I indeed baptize you with water unto repentance, but He who is coming after me is mightier than I, whose sandals I am not worthy to carry. He [Jesus] will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire.” (Mt 3:11)

“And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak with other tongues, as the Spirit gave them utterance.” (Acts 2:4)

The following scripture describes the Samarians as believers who have already been water baptized. However, when Peter and John arrive, they prayed that they might receive the Holy Spirit.

 “Now when the apostles who were at Jerusalem heard that Samaria had received the word of God, they sent Peter and John to them, who, when they had come down, prayed for them that they might receive the Holy Spirit. For as yet He had fallen upon none of them. They had only been baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus. Then they laid hands on them, and they received the Holy Spirit.” (Acts 8:14-17)

As believers, they already had the indwelling Holy Spirit. So why pray? It was to receive the infilling of the Holy Spirit. Therein explains the two experiences.

When I hear someone say that “tongues” was for then . . . not for now, I am reminded of the scripture assuring me that . . .

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.” (Heb 13:8)