GIFTS

by Danna Shirley

My daughter, Kristen’s, eighth birthday was coming soon so I asked her, “Honey, what would you like for your birthday?”

“I want you to quit smoking, Mommy.”

I was surprised by her reply and contemplated this request. After all, back in the day, the Surgeon General’s warning didn’t appear on the pack until long after I had become a smoker.

After a thoughtful moment I assured her, “OK, honey, I’ll quit smoking,” thinking that yes, someday, I would quit. 

“Now, what would you like for your birthday?” I asked again.

“I want you to quit smoking!” She had been hearing of all the health problems associated with smoking at school. 

I appreciated her concern and the worried look on her face but did I really want to quit smoking? No, I thought, I’m not ready to quit. 

Although I had stopped smoking during both of my pregnancies, I had never considered that I shouldn’t begin again after my children were born. Not smoking was just something I had done for the health of my babies . . . not for myself.

“Yes, honey, I’ll quit!” I said, knowing that I really should and some day I would. Then she trapped me with her next word.

“PROMISE?!!!”

Now I had to step back and take a good look at myself and what I was capable of doing before I could answer her question. As I saw the pleading in her face and heard it in her voice, as I considered what it would mean for me to give up this habit and how difficult it might be to fulfill this request, I finally answered with all of the conviction I could muster, “I PROMISE!”

It would be nice to say that I never had another cigarette but I confess that I did; however, I didn’t smoke in front of Kristen again.

In those days there were no gum or patches to rely upon, just sheer will power. I cut down considerably until the day that I finally had my last one. That was thirty-five years ago.              

It was the best gift I ever gave her. 

And the best gift she ever gave me.