by Danna Shirley
Etiquette
used to be taught in the home and was expected to be practiced in public. It
was the proper way to behave and respond in any given situation. Sadly, etiquette
has gone by the wayside and died there. My heart is saddened by how lax and
lethargic we’ve become, not only as a society, but as individuals.
The Lost Art of Parental
Unity
When
the parents were the head of the home, the children knew what was expected of
them and knew who was in charge…and it wasn’t them. The parents taught lessons
of integrity and honesty, morality and trustworthiness. Examples of television
families were Father Knows Best and Make Room For Daddy, later it was Happy
Days and Home Improvement. Still, the parents were respected and valued as
individuals.
When did everything go topsy-turvey and
programming made the children in charge and the parents portrayed as childish,
ignorant, and oblivious as to what was happening in their own home. Hollywood
thought they were making situation comedies but they changed a whole
generation’s lifestyle and culture for the worse and for the detriment of the
family today.
The Lost Art of Opening
the Door
When my daughter was in college in MS, she
dated a young man who would open her car door. While visiting CA, she had a
date with one of her cousin’s friends. He got into the driver’s seat while she remained
outside until he noticed she was waiting for him to come around and open her
door. She was accustomed to being treated with respect and I, for one, was very
proud that she commanded it. I wonder if that impressed the young man and
helped him to change his ways. I read a comment on the web that said, Chivalry is dead. Feminism killed it. No
charges were filed. Femininity is also dead. Ironically, feminism also killed
it.
The Lost
Art of Writing Thank-you Notes
I
grew up sending thank you notes for even the smallest gift received. I taught
my children to send them and my daughter is doing the same with my
granddaughters. I have kept a binder of all their little thank you notes…sweet
and precious. It shows respect to the giver and identifies that the gift was
received and appreciated. Now, when I give a gift and don’t receive even the
thought of recognition, it prompts me to never give another in the future.
The Lost Art of R.S.V.P. and Arriving on Time
As
the hostess of a party, I would definitely want to know how many guests to
expect in order to have enough refreshments for everyone. I would also be
disappointed waiting for late arrivals before serving my guests. On the
opposite side of the question, I hate to be late to a function unless I’ve had
an emergency; then I would call with my apologies, easily done today with cell
phones. Practice the Golden Rule.
The Lost Art of the Dinner Hour
The Lost Art of Letter Writing
Where
have all the letters gone? No one writes longhand anymore. Even cursive has
gone by the wayside and only printing is being taught in school. A hand-written
letter has become valuable if only to preserve one’s own handwriting. Scientific
research has formed a fascinating picture of exactly how old-fashioned writing can benefit our
brains.
1.
You learn faster and read more quickly when you learn to write by hand.
2.
You recall more and understand more deeply if you opt for a pen over a laptop.
3.
You're more creative and there’s a lot less second-guessing while writing
longhand.
4.
Your brain will stay sharp and handwriting is a good cognitive exercise
for those who are aging.
5.
You'll be less distracted; writing can help calm brains made jittery by
constant connectivity.
The Lost
Art of Keeping a Secret
Gossip
is a killer. It can kill reputations, relationships, self-esteem, even
someone’s future. Once a person has been betrayed, it is hard to regain and
restore that trust again. Being vulnerable to share one’s life is frightening
and if you’ve been entrusted with a personal and emotional incident, use great
wisdom and integrity in keeping that confidence. It may be your turn the next
time. Practice the Golden Rule.
The Lost Art of
Courtesy
Rules of kindness, courtesy, and civility always apply in all situations, even on the internet and especially in social media. Be positive. Just because you are behind a screen and seem to be anonymous and invisible does not mean you can be sarcastic and offensive. Practice the Golden Rule.
Rules of kindness, courtesy, and civility always apply in all situations, even on the internet and especially in social media. Be positive. Just because you are behind a screen and seem to be anonymous and invisible does not mean you can be sarcastic and offensive. Practice the Golden Rule.
The Lost Art of Good
Manners / Respect
1.
Stand to show respect when someone
enters or leaves your home.
2.
Be aware of others' space. Don’t cut
someone off when walking in a crowd or driving in a car.
3.
Show respect to your elders. Experience
leads to wisdom and wisdom should be respected.
4.
Acknowledge others entering and exiting
your home. Greet them, shake hands or give a hug; don’t ignore anyone because you’re occupied
on social media or watching television.
6.
Don’t be the center of attention all
the time. Give the floor to others.
7.
Politely change the subject in
conversation. Learn how to interject a new topic.
8.
Don't point or stare at people. Practice
the Golden Rule.
9.
Be considerate and kind to people with
disabilities. Put yourself in their shoes.
10.
Be a good guest. Fit into your host’s household by accepting what they offer
(food, drink, etc.)
The Golden Rule
was given by Jesus of Nazareth:
"So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you . . ." (Mt 7:12)
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