Respect your differences . . .
Eventually
we learned to accept the fact that we had different upbringings. Ron was the
oldest of four boys (responsible) and I was the youngest of three girls (spoiled).
He said, “Yes, sir” and I said, “Yeah.” He said, “Y'all” and I said, “You
guys.” Thank goodness he had shore duty our first year of marriage so we
could get a lot of our clashes out of the way.
Ron was
stationed at Treasure Island near San
Francisco and I worked in Berkeley but we lived in Oakland. We would sometimes get
together with my friends on a weekend. He was always
reserved around new people—watching, listening. They thought they were talking over his head when he didn’t join in the
conversation. When he finally did speak, he blew everyone out of the water.
Most people have a preconceived idea of what Southerners are like, just as I
had had, but Ron didn’t fit that mold—very few Southerners do.
Along
with our different cultures, I learned to respect our different genders. I
launched into my marriage thinking that Ron would be just like my dad, who was
always laid back and unruffled in a household with four vacillating females
(his wife and three daughters).
Ron was a
different story. If he’d let me rule the roost, I would have lost the very
thing that attracted him to me . . . his confidence and conviction. I’m so glad
he stood his ground. Respect for each other begins at home and the one who has
control over that respect is you.
I received
the following letter a few days after his funeral . . .
A few days later, I received the below letter:
Ron’s boss,
Bill Musa, had this to say at his funeral (edited) . . .
The last few days have been tragic. I
spoke to Danna Friday about wanting to say something here so I went through
Ron’s personnel file, which was about a foot high with all kinds of papers and
commendations. Wherever Ron went was total excellence. He’s been the backbone
of any operation. He is the most mild-tempered, even-tempered person I’ve ever
known. Good friend. Outstanding employee.
In the company he was held in the highest
regard; anywhere throughout the company, at the President level down, even up to
the Admirals, including the Japanese Navy, when he spent time there.
His achievements
have been very high. He kept a lot of these things to himself. As far as
Computer Sciences Corporation (CSC), he started out as Principal Engineer, then
Senior Principal Engineer, from there the highest technical position of Principal
Computer Scientist, which is at the Director level or one level below the Vice
President. These achievements are something to be proud of but Ron didn’t want
me to let anyone know when his last promotion happened. That’s the kind of a
guy Ron was.
He has left a tremendous hole in the
operation world-wide in the Aegis program—both in our ships and other ships
from other nations.
I would say that everyone, as far as a
goal for work or achievements, would be to look up and say, “If I could just
get half of Ron’s passion and work ethic.”
Ron
was a man. He had authority in his world (Navy). He had the respect of his
peers. I am so proud of him. Oh, my man, I love him so.
LIFE TO CONSIDER . . .
It is my
desire to have a happy marriage and live with a contented husband. My
marriage is for life; therefore I will consider . . .
How does
God view my husband's role in our family? My role?
Proverbs 5:18,18:22,
and 31:10-31
Ecclesiastes 9:9
Jeremiah
32:39
Matthew
19:4-6
1
Corinthians 7:3-4
Ephesians
5:21-33
Hebrew
13:4
1 Peter
3:1, 7
Do I respect my husband in our home? with our children? in his employment? in our community?
What can I say or do this week to show respect for my husband?
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